Lenten Journal

2-21-07
Woke up with more energy today. It helps that the snow is melting and the sun out. Went to pick up Ida Mae, my Amish cleaning helper, for the first time since her gall bladder operation four weeks ago. She's doing much better. And Senior Seminar today was wonderful. The students ran the class beautifully--Kristine and Alex gave their "English Major" initial statements in which both expressed reserve and ambivalence about their majors. Then Erin and Anita led a succinct and coherent discussion of cultural construction and Borges' story "The Garden of Forking Paths." I just sat back and the students engaged each other in conversation for a good hour, enjoying the opportunity for cross-talk. I could truly practice "sitting quietly" and allowing them to take over the space. Kristine and Alex stopped to talk with me after class about their essays and I assured them that their ambivalence was a normal English major phase. They mentioned, too, the practical emphasis of Mennonite culture--the anxiety that they weren't doing anything worthwhile when they were reading and writing poetry. Sad, but so true. Alice stopped by to ask about helping me with the newsletter and working as a student assistant. An answer to prayer.
Borges's story has many interesting facets, but one that seems prophetic to me now is that it is filled with intercultural conflict: the story of a Chinese Spy teaching English in a German School in England, working for Germans he despises in order to prove that the Chinese are worthy. And then assassinating the British sinologist who has solved the mystery of his grandfather's labyrinth in order to send a message to the German General about the location of the next English attack--and dying with regret at having committed such a crime without provocation. The entire story seems to be told through the mind of a ghost, and the inherent ethnic conflict all too prophetic. I wish I'd brought this up with the students, but I'm even prouder of myself that I could stay in the background and let them run the course.
To night at yoga I worked hard, almost didn't have the energy to hold plank position long enough to do the moves Kara was teaching us. It would go better, I realized, if I practiced every day as though it were a music lesson. But even once a week the practice is beneficial. I kept Willow for Lizzie during her yoga class and beyond. Mostly Willow was restless, and turned and turned in my arms like a little screw. "Monkey" I decided is her animal name.
I have 3 poems in my Lenten commonplace book now, after two day, and have enjoyed reading student responses to Susan Neville's Iconography--asking them to write about a metaphor that intrigued them has worked really well. Helps them to look at the texture of the writing, which is its best part. And one student, Emily, wrote tonight that Neville's honesty about her own imperfections invites the reader to spiritual practice as well.